Cat Sheely

Writer and opinionated reader


Retirement and Timelines

timthumb.phpThis week I will celebrate the 2nd anniversary of my retirement. Well, almost retirement I suppose.  I’ve done a few small jobs to keep my hand in and, of course, the writing. But there is an interesting thing happening with me in terms of the work vs retirement mindset. I’m really beginning to hate, with a  passion, deadlines – even ones I’ve set for myself.

I’ve always been one to be early or on time for whatever I’m doing; appointments, work deadlines, submission deadlines and so on. Always. Yet over the last few months I’ve found myself turning away from deadlines. I’m beginning to feel they are an infringement of my newly found freedom. I don’t set alarm clocks and make all necessary appointments (doctor, dentist, coffee with friends) for a decent hour i.e. 10am or later.

So.Am I getting lazy? Becoming an old fart? Or is it just that I’ve finally settled into retirement and there is an adjustment I still have to make? For example, I still want to finish my book, send it in to a few publishers in case it’s any good, and see what happens. I still need to finish short stories for various anthologies I’ve set myself a goal to submit to. And yet, I’m  avoiding doing anything to achieve these self-identified tasks.

I think a lot about doing all this stuff I’ve set for myself. But hey, were did my motivation go?  Come BAAAACK!Layout 1

Yes, I’ve visited my family often, and managed to get every virus the grandkids have picked up. And Yes, hubby and I have done some travelling. But I’ve had days where I’ve sat and knitted or cross-stitched rather than sit at the computer.

I think it’s a reaction to over 40 years of the “MUSTS”; must get a better job, must get a promotion, must to well and prove myself, must get another degree, must get another qualification, must… must… must….

Now it’s all about my own wants, and I have got a definite aversion to the ‘must do [whatever]‘.

Is it freedom? Is it just a short term thing and I will get my motivation back? Is it ‘old fart’ syndrome? Who knows, but I wish it would stop.

Yep, I hear you. Only I can make it stop. You’re absolutely right. But send me some good vibes so my mojo returns.

 


It’s Done! And more as well.

So I’ve blogged about procrastination and wanting to finish my novel.  Well… I did it!  It’s finished.  77, 984 words.

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OK, the writing is finished.  Now comes the editing.  And believe it or not, I’ve already started that.  I think I mentioned I went to a great workshop with Ian McHugh on editing and I’m trying really hard to follow the guidelines.  Read and fix structure, then check characters and only then worry about the line edits.  So I’m reading from scratch.

But I keep wanting to pick up line edits and stuff.  It’s taking quite a bit of concentration and putting data into a spreadsheet as I do it, to ensure I’m sticking to the plan.  After all, this is the first book I’ve edited and it’s much more complex than a short story.  For one, there are many more characters and for another, it takes place in multiple locations.  Have I got all the elements I need? Are all the story elements covered and resolved? Is it logical in terms of the storyline?

So far, after 2 chapters, it’s OK but that, I think, is the easy bit.  It will take a bit of work before I can go on to making sure the characters are as rounded as they need to be and have their own voices.  Actually, that latter bit worries me but maybe I’m OK.  We’ll see.

On top of that I’ve been searching for a topic/theme/storyline for the next CSfG anthology ‘Never, Never Land’.  I don’t think I’m much good at Mad Max stuff and apocalyptic themes are a bit overdone for me.  So, horror, scifi, fantasy or what?  No answers for that here but I think I might have something that I can work with.  Finger’s crossed.

All in all, I’ve found my mojo again after months of … what? Thinking?  Wondering?  Worrying? Well I decided to stop the latter, keep wonder at my core and use it for good and stop thinking and write.  Seems to have worked for me.


Writing but not Blogging

So.  It’s been a while… again.  I have been reading and writing.  Just not writing about reading and writing.  Mainly because I haven’t had anything very interesting to say.  I don’t blog just for the sake of blogging.  I prefer to have an idea, an opinion or a happening I want to share.

Oh yes, I’ve been a busy girl.  Haven’t we all.  It’s been about family and that’s very satisfying.  But I don’t feel I need to air my family good times online.  Those are personal times and I love them.  And I am very cautious about what I actually send out into the great big permanent world of the internet.

What I have been doing is reading a lot of other people’s blogs on writing and spending time with local writers doing ‘stuff’.  I’m trying to improve my writing to a point where I believe I can let it out into the world and be proud of it.  Yes, I’ve been fortunate to have several stories published.  But today I would probably write them more tightly were I to do them again.

I’ve also been working on a novel since NaNoWriMo last November.  I’m working on the final chapters and it’s getting hard to wrap it all up.  I’ve been to courses including Ian McHugh’s ‘Polishing Your Turd’.  And that is actually what’s next for me.  Taking my creation and whipping it into shape.  A bit of a daunting prospect.  I’ve read that some writers actually enjoy that bit most… just not me.  As Ian said, I will have to ‘put on the overalls’ and begin the hard work.

And what have I learned over the past four months?  That I’ve still got a long way to go but that I’m determined to go there.  its_a_long_way_to_go____by_moonshadowgirl

Oh, I’ve equivocated.  The old ‘I don’t need to write, I’ve proved myself in other ways’ thoughts, or ‘I’m retired, I don’t need to push myself,’ or ‘I’ll never be as good as [fill in popular author] so why try.’  But then the mood hits and I have to sit at the computer and create a story; good, bad or indifferent.  I’ve been doing that most of my life, if not on computer than in notebooks while sitting waiting for someone or something, at coffee shops, in airport lounges.  I realise, looking back, I’ve always written and I feel happy when I do.  And therefore I MUST finish this book.

And I have also realised it’s not that I want anyone to say how wonderful it is, or it could be a best seller (a highly unlikely scenario).  I want to create something and finish it as best I can.  And if others like it, it’s a bonus.  And this has been the most important realisation, that I NEED to write, and write for me.

I do have two people to thank for all this ‘realising’.  The first is my dear friend M.A. Dunham, Marisol to me.  We met at the evening meeting of our local writing group the Eurobodalla Fellowship of Australian Writers (EFAW).  We’ve become fast friends and she’s a delightful and very talented writer.  She’s been chivvying me and we’ve spent days writing together.  And then there is Ian McHugh.  Beside being a delightful friend he’s a wonderful teacher.  He makes difficult issues like editing your own stuff seem a simple process of knuckling down and going through a process.  Of course, that’s what it is, but until he laid it out clearly, I really don’t think I had any idea of how to go about it.

And then there is the crew at CSfG.  How can you not be inspired by ‘Writers of the Future’ winners like Ian and Shauna O’Meara, and all the other wonderful published authors that make up the group.

So, to finish where I started.  I’ve not been blogging but I’ve been busy with family and writing.  And maybe, sometime this year, I will have a novel to put out there.  Fingers crossed.

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A Fight with Procrastination

So.  In November I managed just over 60,000 words for NaNoWriMo.  I was proud of myself.  I knew that another 30,000 words would finish the novel.  Then came December, Christmas, New Year and family.  All good reasons not to get on with it.  But early January, that was over and done with.  By the end of January, the novel would be finished.  But no.   Not even remotely done.

200px-%22Mino_Monkey_Dark%22_concept_artI’ve been reading in all sorts of places about the ‘dark monkey’ of procrastination.  The devil of procrastination. I know I’m doing it.  I get another 1 or 2k words done and it’s over with for a week.  My characters are doing their own thing too, going off in directions I hadn’t planned on.  May I add I think they’ve got it right.  But knowing I’m procrastinating and doing something about it is very, very hard.  My good friend and writing buddy Marison Dunham has been helping.  She comes over, I get work done.  She’s a bright spark in my writing day.  But she leaves and I go right back to the ‘I’ll get into it tomorrow’ phase.

Argh!little_devil_by_davidj8580-d5rv2gn

Yes, I know.  Discipline.  Something I’ve always had trouble with.  You see, I know the ending… sort of. Or do I?  As I said, my characters are doing strange things.  Am I afraid of them? Of what they want me to write?  I think the answer is yes.  Also I think I’m afraid to finish this because it might be rubbish. I’m not really sure anyone would want to read it.  But then, is that why I write? For others? If I’m honest, the answer to that is maybe.

I guess I want it all done and over with … now.  Not tomorrow, next month but now.  I can’t seem to wait to go through the process of actually finishing it. Or is that just another excuse?

Doldrums.  No wind and the writing boat is floating in a sea of insecurity.

Thanks for listening.  Now it’s out there.  Guess I’ll have to do something about it.

PS: Anyone got a whip?


CHRISTMAS GREETINGS …in all shapes and formats

satcChristmas

This year has been more interesting than usual in terms of the Christmas Card.  In the past I used to send out up to 60 cards each Christmas to friends and family.  It was always a chore but one worth doing.  And in return we usually got almost as many cards with wonderful greetings.

But things have changed. Now I send out maybe 25 cards that go to older family and very close friends because I add a ‘Christmas Letter’ that gives a potted history of what the family has been up to for the past year.  This has become quite the thing to do as I normally get about 7 or 8 of these in return.  I love hearing about our friends and their families and sometimes they include interesting photo’s as well.  Our older relatives tend to hand write their letter on the Christmas Cards.  I wonder how many of us actually write anything more than a quick greeting anymore?  Not many I’m guessing.

And then there are the 15 or so emails that include a short message and our Christmas Letter. A few of these go overseas and they are much quicker and more sure than the now expensive snail mail version.  Finally there are the few that are animated eCards and animated videos (JibJab etc).  I have to blame my daughter for getting me into JibJab as she was the first to send one to friends and family several years back. They are fun to make and fun to receive (but hard to put up with the other Cards and letters).

This year has been surprising in that one of my older friends has sent me an animated Christmas Card. It reminds me that no matter what age, there is always the possibility of mental flexibility to remain up-t0-date with technology.  I hope I’m that cool at 80+.

So like everything else, the Christmas Greeting is changing fast, becoming technologically sophisticated and yet still it means that we are thinking of our relatives and friends and wish them well for the festive season and for the coming year.

As an aside, isn’t it funny that here in Australia we still often send Christmas Cards that show a winter scene when Australian Christmas cards abound.  Anyway, as I started out with an Aussie picture, so -

 I wish you a Merry Christmas and a Prosperous 2014

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To Bah Humbug OR Not to Bah Humbug

bah-humbug-catSo here we are and it’s just over a week to Christmas Day.  I’ve not done all the housework, I’ve not done my Christmas Cards and I’m not sure about 2 Christmas presents I still need to buy.  So I’m thinking stress is happening here. Bah Humbug.

On the other hand we hosted the street Christmas Party last Sunday and, despite all the work, it was heaps of fun.  I love my neighbours and their wonderful kids.  We played the traditional street cricket and had games which hubby spent a week working up – lots of small presents to the winners (and all the kids got something).  So Not Bah Humbug.

I’ve not done any writing this month because I’ve been too busy (Bah Humbug), I’ve had lots of fun with my family (Not Bah Humbug) and so you can see that I’m still on the fence about Christmas.  Overall, I mostly feel in the Bah Humbug camp.  It’s an expensive time of year, even if we only buy presses for the kids and these days I’m not even sure what to buy the littlest ones – they already have everything they need/want.

There are some  delightful things about the Christmas period.  I get to have my whole family around me for more than a quick weekend visit from one or other family – I love that bit. Oh, and the Christmas Eve tradition with my delightful vegetarian friend who always cooks a pork roast for it – and it always tastes delicious. We’ve been doing that for quite a few years and Christmas wouldn’t be Christmas without it. And then, we’ve got a few more additions to the Christmas Eve family which is absolutely the best thing ever.

Hmmm.  OK, I’ve decided…. NOT Bah Humbug despite all the hassle.

5 MINUTE CHRISTMAS BLUES
by Cat Sheely

Thank heavens it comes but once a year
Couldn’t cope with it more often,
I have to get my tush in gear
Or it might end up a rough ‘n.

Presents left to buy, money running out,
Ideas are in a muddle.
I get it  wrong it’s all for nought,
My tears will make a puddle.

But then, I think of family dear,
I love them ever more.
I’ll do my best despite the fear,
To bring presents to their door.

And if it’s wrong, oh well I say,
I did my very best.
I love you all in the nicest way,
And after Christmas; a good rest.

 


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It’s Almost Christmas – Again!

Oh my, but I cannot believe another year has rushed past and it is a few weeks to Christmas 2013.  I knew everyone says it, but the year has really flown by.  Going backward, I’ve just finished the NaNoWriMo – I managed 60,000 words on a new novel.  So only another 25,000 or so to finish the first draft.  On top of that we’ve travelled just over 5,500 kilometres since mid-September.  We visited children and grand-children several times each, went to Phillip Island for the Motorcycle GP, I enjoyed a wonderful time in Sydney with my close and dear friend whom I met at school and enjoyed a High Tea at the Sir Stamford – very posh.  And all of that in my new Mazda 3 – she’s a real beauty, not just to drive but to look at too – red with a black interior.

So that was just the past three months.  The ones before included lots of fun and writing with the Eurobodalla FAW evening group that we set up in March/April.  We have some wonderful writers including Marisol Dunham and Cassandra Webb.  The little group has been growing and we now have 7 delightful members all writing books. I’m webmistress for the Eurobodalla FAW website as well and setting that up was fun.

Add to all this the Write a Book in A Day with the CSFG, the 24 hour story challenge that I managed to write a whole story for and the workshop with Ian McHugh last month and it’s been a busy time.

I’m the editor of the 2014 Eurobodalla FAW 20th anniversary anthology ‘Mutable States’ and we’ve already had 11 submissions that are currently with the slush-readers, so I see that next year is going to start with a bang.

I’m looking forward to having the family at Broulee this Christmas/New year.  With two additions to the family the house will be noisy and fun.

If you’re interested in a great Christmas poem, go over to the Eurobodalla FAW site where Maxine McIlveney has allowed us to reproduce a pearler of a Christmas tale called “The Chimney Job”.

As for me, I’m back to my novel.  I’ve decided that 25k words for December is my target and I’m already falling behind.  Maybe one day in the future I’ll be sprouting that the thing is done and being published – I wish (fingers crossed).

And yes, this is all an excuse for not having been a very good blogger. But then, life has overtaken my blogging and I’m not altogether sorry about that :-)

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